Divine Centered Leadership/Motive

1. There are many things that motivate me to volunteer as a leader in BYUSA. My motives have definitely changed since June though. At first I was in it for somewhat selfish reasons. I liked the way that volunteering made me feel and I felt like I was growing as a leader. Since fall has started and we have really got things going though, my motive has shifted away from myself a little bit and shifted onto how I can help my PDs and committee members. I absolutely love seeing them grow and learn. A few days ago I was talking to one of my PDs (Emily) and she told me that she was going to head up to the office for a little bit to fill out EAFs. I asked her if she needed any help, and she said that she was good to go. I was so excited! Not necessarily because I was the one that taught her how to do all that, but because she had started to grow as a leader and fit in to her role.

 2. I don't feel like I have any glaring problems of unrighteousness in my leadership, but there are definitely ways that I can improve. This is maybe a strange way to look at it, but I think that one of my struggles has been with self-confidence here at BYUSA. When I first came into the office I was very intimidated by those around me and I sometimes "hid my light under a bushel" as the Savior told us not to do. Sometimes I have struggled "letting my light so shine" because I don't want to be perceived as cocky or arrogant. But I think that there is a careful balance between being overbearing and being under confident. I have learned a lot so far this year and semester, and there is nothing wrong with letting that light shine through as long as it is done tactfully.

3. This might contradict what I said above, but in high school I loved the spotlight. I ran for student body president my senior year and made it pretty far. I lost the election, but everyone told me that I should run for senior class president. Usually the person who lost the student body president position won senior class, and I was excited to try it out. Through a series of events, I felt like I shouldn't run for president because of another position that had been offered to me as a member of the seminary council. I was torn, because I knew that I should accept the calling to be on the seminary council, but I had planned on doing student council for years. It was a big sacrifice to give up popularity for a calling, but I knew it was the best choice. 

This made a huge impact on my life that year. Through seminary council I learned things that I would not have been able to learn as senior class president, and I still improved as a leader. One of the most important things this experience taught me was to rely on Heavenly Father and to be guided by the Spirit in my decisions.

Empowerment

Self-efficacy: I will become knowledgeable about my job here in BYUSA. I will know the details of my programs and the basic advertising process that those programs will go through.

How I'll do it: I will read the histories of the programs (if those histories exist) and talk to those individuals who know more about it than I do. This list of people could include VPs, coordinators, past program directors, etc. I can follow up on this with my team because once I am prepared with the information I can share it with others.

Self-determination: According to the source of all knowledge (google) self-determination is "the process by which a person controls their own life." The talk I read for the conflict blog post has been on my mind lately and I have been thinking about how to make my life more balanced. I tend to work really hard and not leave a lot of time for relaxing, and so I want my life to be more balanced.

How I'll do it: I am better able to deal with things if I know what is coming and can plan ahead. I will be more consistent at writing down and prioritizing my assignments and responsibilities and make specific time in my schedule to unwind and relax. :) I don't really feel like I need to inform the Comms team on how I'm doing with this, but I will know if I am or am not following the schedule I have made.

Personal Consequences: I want to be a effective leader of leaders and make an impact on my program directors and their committee. However, at the end of the year I don't want them to say, "Mallory was a good ED because she did..." I want them to say, "Mallory trusted me enough to let me make my own decisions and lead the program in the direction of my vision. She was helpful, but allowed personal responsibility."

How I'll do it: I had a great conversation with Tamara about stretching our volunteers to become their better selves. I think that the points we talked about in the lesson (vision and values, provide support, provide information and resources, etc.) are a great start. If I can practice those principles then I can teach those principles to my PDs and it can go down the chain.

Meaningfulness: As part of the Communications Vision that we established, we talked about making every person who comes into the office feel valued. This idea really hit home to me. If we can make all the volunteers feel welcome then our organization will be more successful.

How I'll do it: I will get back to all the volunteers that call or e-mail me, as well as greeting everyone that I talk to or give a tour to a warm welcome and a smile (as cliche as that sounds).

Trust: I want all my PDs and their committees to feel like they can trust me with the struggles they are having with the programs. I want them to know that I will listen and help them however I can.

How I'll do it: Trust is something that is built up over a long period of time. I will build that trust by replying to their e-mails and phone calls promptly, and by listening to them whenever they come to me with questions. 

Conflict

The conflict resolution skill that I chose to work on this week was managing emotions. I tend to get really emotionally involved in what I'm doing and sometimes that becomes a problem. So for the past little while I have been trying to work on maintaining balance and not let my stress take over. And since this is the end of the term, we all have lots going on, so this was a perfect time to practice this skill. :)

I read a really great talk on lds.org that was given by Robert K. Wagstaff titled "Preparing Emotionally for Missionary Service." I'm not serving a mission anytime in the very soon future, but I hope to someday and so this talk seemed to fit well with that goal and also my goal of maintaining balance. The talk gave eight suggestions on how to be emotionally prepared for a mission, but I think it can also be applied to life in general, and it definitely helped me.

Seeing as I can't post the whole wonderful talk here, I'll just go through a few highlights. The first point I want to address is to "practice living a balanced life." College can make this easier, and also harder. It's easier to be balanced because for the most part, the only person you have to worry about taking care of is yourself. College is a great time to do new things, and learn a lot about yourself. However, it is also hard to be balanced because we are all being pulled in a million directions. One thing that I liked about the article is that it said, "Using a day-planning system and taking part in extracurricular activities can help young people learn to manage time and meet deadlines. Examples include holding a job or participating in activities such as sports, drama, clubs, student government, or community service." Participate in student government and service? Hmm... :) I think that this has some merit to it. When I am involved and spending my time becoming better, I feel better about what is going on in my life.

Another part that I really liked was the part that said, "They may feel distressed when the demands of being a missionary show them weaknesses they had never encountered before. But, as the prophet Ether taught, recognizing our weaknesses can teach us humility and reliance on the Lord and success in overcoming our weaknesses (see Ether 12:27)." Although this is talking about missionaries, I think it can apply to me. I have learned a lot about myself during this short term, but I also can relate to the idea that I have been shown weaknesses that I didn't know I had. And what a great opportunity I have to make those weaknesses strengths.

I had a great conversation with Sarah today about this article and what I have learned this week. We talked about how we've been commanded to be perfect, but we don't have to be perfect right now. Perfection right now for us is a journey. I still have a long way to go, but I feel like this week was a good learning experience for me.

The Honor Code

I think that the Lord has required an honor code at BYU because He has required standards for us. It wouldn't make sense to have a Church based university and not expect the same standards at that university that are expected of members other places. I also think that a reason we have the Honor Code is that it creates a much better learning environment. I think most people automatically think of the Dress and Grooming Standards first, and that does contribute to a better learning environment definitely. Another aspect of the honor code that I think contributes to a better educational experience is the fact that we have visiting hours. As a result of the visiting hours, my roommates can only have boys until a certain time, and that means that we can all get sleep and be able to stay awake and focus in class. This is a simple rule, but it makes a huge difference.

I have noticed several blessings that have come into my life because of the honor code. The benefits to my education have already been addressed, but I have seen other blessings as well. As a result of my obedience to the honor code I have been able to have the Spirit with me more in my life and I find that I am better able to handle the pressures that life brings. And that is a great thing. :) Along with having the Spirit with me, I have just felt better overall. There are aspects of the honor code that keep us in good physical health, and we are better able to handle life when we feel good.

Being a Leader of Leaders

I am a leader of leaders in several ways. The most obvious in the BYUSA sense is that I am an Executive Director and I lead my Program Directors, who lead their committees. Last year when I was the FHE mom of my group I was a leader of leaders because I lead my FHE family, who then led within their callings. I think that we are all leaders of leaders in one way or another.

I can be a more divine-centered leader of leaders by following the principles outlined in the lesson. There were a lot of great thoughts that were brought up, but I'm just going to address two. The first one is "thy mind, o man, must stretch." I really enjoyed this because of a conversation I had about a volunteer I was working with. This volunteer had worked in the area before, and felt like she knew exactly what was best for the program. Tamara and I talked about how to help her grow as a leader. We talked about how to help her stretch and always be striving to be better. Christ commanded us to be perfect, and right now none of us are. But eventually we can be, if we are constantly stretching and trying to improve right now.

The other point that I liked was about unity. One of our goals here is to create Zion communities which are of "one heart and one mind." Unity starts from the top and goes down, as we discussed. Once all of us as EDs are united with our coordinator and VP, then we can become united with out PDs and then the committees. So much more can be accomplished when people feel valued and feel like they have a place. Christ loved and served everyone, especially those who were not likely candidates for other people's attention. I really like the "spatula" analogy that has been used in class, where we scrape the edges of the bowl (figuratively speaking) and try to get everyone involved.